I was reading an article yesterday in the YOU magazine by Julia Restoin Rotfield, where she gives advice “to women who don’t want to suddenly become “just mums”, and I was wondering what happened to the women who do want to only be parents and whether they saw the “just” as a negative?
From chatting to my friends and from my own experience I felt under pressure to stay in the work loop and fit my child into my hectic schedule and as I was a self-employed professional development coach and trainer, was anxious that I could be out of the game for too long. However, I didn’t really know how long was too long!
I envied my friends who had become “just mums”, through what seemed like long periods of maternity leave or those who seemed able to afford to give up work and also those who were completely fulfilled from simply having this tiny baby in their lives. I felt anxious and confused about how to split my roles of mother, wife and self employed business consultant, whilst begrudging not having ‘me’ time as well. As an older mother, I also felt that I had to prove it all could be done, with both panache and style and with as little dribble as possible. Looking back it was a hell of a first year. 
Friends who were full time mothers described it as a lifetime choice or career change, and I loved these exprssions. There is no “just” about being a parent, it is THE full time job, with unsocial hours, conflicts and unexpected events happening, as well as all the joy of seeing each new stage of development, without having one eye on emails. Sometimes I wish I had made that choice and dammed the consequences!
